Why are you Catholic?

(by MarcoPolo - Catholic Answers Forum)
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* I like to pour my guts out in a dark closet to a stranger.
* I like being subordinated to higher authorities, especially especially if they wear black with a white collar.
* I like watching infants get baptized because a lot of them need baths.
* I like the thought of getting a "second chance" in a fantasy world called purgatory, because let's face it, Christ didn't get the job done on the Cross.
* I enjoy putting my money in a basket and handing it to someone else.
* I like praying the Rosary because the beads make little clicking sounds when they dangle.
* In the winter time, I like to go to late-morning mass so I can miss the first possession of the Bears game.
* I like hiding the Bible from other people so they don't find out the truth.
* I like the thought of relics. They make great collector's items, and should be utilized on eBay.
* I enjoy kneeling in adoration chapels on a hard floor to a "wafer."
* I like reciting "canned prayers" because I have no capacity to think of one myself.
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:-)